An it harm none, do as ye will.

HELP STOP THE SEAL MURDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mon, 28 Dec 2009 19:30:52 GMT

The Canadian Winter Olympic games allow for the brutal slaughtering of thousands of seals every year. Do you know how these seals are murdered??? They are either shot, or have their heads smashed in, and then are skinned alive. I ask anyone who reads this, would you want to have this happen to you?? It is a horrific death, for no better reason, than for pure sport!!!!!!!! Please read this, and do what you can to get involved: Sign up to Peta2, and sign the petition to HELP SAVE THE SEALS!!!!!! Thank you all for reading this. Together, we can stop the pain!!!

The Goddess vs. Wicca

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 20:47:56 GMT

I read on wikipedia that some Dianic Wiccans do not even wish to be considered 'wiccan'. Some are known as 'Goddessians.' Some even prefer the term 'Dianic', but are not wiccan. To be honest, I'm considering switching my faiths. I still feel as a 'witch', I am still studying witchcraft, but I don't know if I'm interested in wicca, anymore, if that makes sense. I'm really confused. I just don't know if my views fall in the 'wiccan' category. I know lots of women who still believe in the Goddess and practice Her magick, but do not consider themselves wiccan. Only pagan. Perhaps I should do the same? I love The Goddess with ALL my heart, and I have a yearn for Her and Her protection, I just don't know if my views fit in anymore. I've kind of been mulling things over for the past few days. Is this normal? Has anyone had problems like this before? What should I do? I kind of feel that if people see it this way, they do not belong in Wicca anyway. I just don't know!!

Schoolwork and family

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 15:24:23 GMT

Schoolwork is getting the best of me nowadays. I'm in the middle of a CLC (group study), and I'm a team leader, and I SWEAR I'm doing ALL of the damn work!! It's not fair. I'm beginning NOT to like this college thing very much. I've been messing up in school so much, I'm surprised I'm not failing. What is WRONG with me?? I just can't focus anymore. All I want to do is run out the door, and never come back. Also, I want to study my wicca. I don't want to study philosophy when my mind keeps slipping back to witchcraft/wicca/The Goddess/The God. I wish there was a way to specialize in college by doing wicca. LOL That would be awesome.

My family situation is very stressful, as well. My mom keeps offering to baby sit my niece when she KNOWS I have two 1500 word essays, and a presentation to work on.And WHO can concentrate on homework when an eight month old baby is SCREAMING in the background? If I get mad about it, it doesn't help. If I talk to Mom about it, it doesn't help. NOTHING helps. I don't know what to do, I'm on the verge of ripping my hair out. I'm trying to get a job just so I can get out of the house and get a little peace. I swear, my brother can't take care of his own kid. He runs to Mom EVERYDAY and gets her to baby sit. WTH. I'm beginning to feel as if I'm the one who has had a kid, just because I have to take care of the baby all the time. UUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I hate this.

Anyways, I'm just rambling. I wanted to do an update. :) I don't want to just forget my journal, or my friends. I hope everyone is doing great, please let me know!! :)
I love you guys, thank you for reading, and listening to my blurbs. LOL

I'm so happy!

Sun, 11 Oct 2009 18:46:40 GMT

This is so fantastic. I know that becoming wiccan again and coming back to my beloved friends was that ABSOLUTELY the 100% right thing to do, I felt it in my heart, my soul, my entire world. I am so happy. I have missed EVERYONE!! I love everybody, and I feel. . .right. I'm like a lost sheep without my faith. WHY did I ever get 'rid' of wicca? That was horrible. The Goddess (and The God, because I don't think it is right to exclude Him) were trying to tell me all along that I should come back, but I would not listen. Now I am wiser.
I think Ive changed, too. I'm happier. I feel at peace, at ease. :) I'm going to try to blog everyday, and if I don't, then. . .someone slap me. LOL

I love everyone, especially Amy and Brandy. :)

I'm BAAAACK!!!

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 16:43:08 GMT

I've missed everyone. I've been MIA for SOOO long, it hurt. I hope I haven't offended anyone by not answering any of their messages, I've just been going through so much, it was hard to login online. I still love all of my friends that I have made, and I am hurting without talking to them. If anybody reads this, please know that I did not mean to just up and leave. My life has been so. . .confusing, anymore.

I love Brandy, Amy, Tink, and anybody else that I have talked to, and who has helped me in my path. Please come back, I miss you all. I know that I am not the most social person in the world, and I am truly sorry. From now on, I will be logging in almost every day, and checking up on LJ. If anyone wants to chat more, my e-mail address is AprilDMarlene@aol.com.
:)
Blessed Be.

Ronnie Radke

Sun, 19 Oct 2008 18:09:10 GMT

I am so happy, I found the new interview in Las Vegas Weekly that was published about Ronnie. I am ecstatic, it feels like I am walking through clouds. God, I love him so much. It fills me with hope that he is happy and content, and has plans for when he gets out. He is getting clean, he is in a rehab program, he's actually being responsible for his drug addiction. Bless him!! I absolutely fell in love with him all over again. I have to admit, it's EXTREMELY nice to hear Ronnie's side of the story. It's nice to hear someone listening to him and understanding what he has to say, instead of calling him a killer and a junkie, insisting that he's good for nothing. That makes me SO fucking angry. I like Escape The Fate a lot, but it's not that great to see them being down on Ronnie (in fact all the damn fans are, as well) and then putting out pictures and interviews, expecting a lot of praise. In my opinion, real fans of the band wouldn't want one side of the band turning on another.
I don't know, I just relate more to Ronnie. So fucking screw me. It's hard to like ETF after all their drama. Another big difference is that ETF are always yelling at the fans or being extremely cold to them, saying pretty much 'fuck you' and whatnot. Ronnie is the opposite. He's extremely sorry for the things he has done to the fans in the past, and even said that it was his karma that came back to him and landed him in prison. He's working SO HARD at answering every single letter that the fans send him.

I don't know, it's just wonderful to see Ronnie living up to his potential and getting healthy. He's one step at a time working through his problems. Someday, when he gets stronger, I would love to see the band that he creates. :) I'm behind him all the way. I support him. I don't support his drug use or legal troubles, but I support him as a person because I believe he's a wonderful, intelligent guy. *HUGGLES*

Grand Canyon University

Sat, 18 Oct 2008 00:17:45 GMT

I got into Grand Canyon University and I'm really happy, I'm really excited. I'm nervous about it though, because I know the workload will be EXTREME. Like Mom wisely told me, Bachelor's of Psychology is NO JOKE. What if I can't handle it? What if something happens and I fly off course? NO. I have to force myself to stop thinking like that, EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY. EVERYTHING must be PERFECT. I want this more than I have ever wanted anything before in my life. Now that I know I have the guts to so forth in my journey for a challenging career, let's see if I have the gull to keep going. I think that's the key here.
It's normal to be scared when you're first starting off in something new, and I really have an exact goal in mind. I WANT to make it to my masters, and then the PHD level. I know I can do this, I HAVE to. Why couldn't I, anyways? I want something higher for myself, I don't want the kind of education that has me stuck doing mediocre work in a gas station the rest of my lives. (BTW, I'm not trying to insult the people who actually DO work in stores, gas stations for a living, I realize that keeps food on the table. What I'm atually saying is I don't want to be stuck doing it when I could aim for something more.)

Anyways, I'm just kind of feeling a bit. . .small. Helpless, nervous. I suppose that's what's going on. I'm doing something big, so everything feels overwhelming at this point. Once I get into it I KNOW everything will be fine. :)

B-day!!!

Thu, 18 Sep 2008 17:48:18 GMT

My birthday!! Yea!! I know I said before that I was dreading turning 20, but I don't think I am anymore. I'm ready for it. It's not such a bad thing. It's more like the beginning of a new stage, a new chapter, in my life. I don't want to be sad all the time everytime a new experience comes about. How can I ever live life that way? I miss out on everything. I was scared out of my wits when I turned 18 because I thought I was going to be thrown into unknown life that I wasn't ready for, but it wasn't so bad once I got there. I loved being 18. It was the best year. Hopefully 20 will be okay (although I don't want to jinx it by saying anything.)

A lot of good things have happened today. My sister made me a GORGEOUS booklet of poems and pictures. It took her forever to do!! I love it so much, I'm keeping it safe from harm. (cats, especially. They like to mess with my stuff.)My mom is going to make a really good cake with ice cream (urgh, fat and calories, lol) but I'm still looking forward to it. My brother called this morning and wished me a happy b-day. That meant a lot to me.
The only thing that could make this any better is if Josh, my half brother, would write or send flowers (as he did last year). I haven't heard from him yet.

Anyway, I feel happy right now. I love my life!!

Haircut!!!!

Sat, 16 Aug 2008 15:47:06 GMT

I'm going to get my hair cut today!! Yea!!! I like sporty looking styles with bangs in the front. This one will have incredibly short bangs, with cut down edges. I need something that'll be convenient when I'm out running, but it still looks good at the same time. lol I can't wait to see how it turns out. I'm also dyeing my hair, as well. Purple!! Well, dark burgundy. But on my face it'll probably look the same. lololol I always get the kind with no ammonia so it won't crisp my hair. I had originally wanted it done in a salon, like Angela had hers done, but I decided not to trust strangers with my hair. It's easier to ask Mom to do it all for me because she listens better. Hairstylers always cut a little too much off. (They did with Angela, but it still looks fab.) Mom gets so nervous she follows instructions RIGIDLY. lololol
My hair is so damaged right now that I NEED to find something new to do with it. Plus, I'm inspired because my sister Angela had her hair done and it looks BEAUTIFUL. :)
I'm excited, I hope it all turns out okay. YEA!!! :)

Vegetarianism

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 00:20:57 GMT

I LOVE being a vegetarian, I LOVE the decision I made. No one can take it away from me, it's my choice and I'm committing to it for as long as it feels right. I think I'm going to transition to being a vegan pretty soon. It's weird, I heard on a diet site that not eating eggs (which along with meat has been cast out of my food choices) makes me a vegan?
Are eggs dairy? I know vegans don't eat ANY animal product, dairy included. Either way, it's fine with me.
I'm going to work on cutting out things like yogurts (and getting soy yogurts instead) and the dreaded MILK CHOCOLATE that haunts me everyday. lololol Milk is going to be a hard one to get rid of, because I need it so much. But it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.
Like I said, this is the best choice ever. For me, anyway. It might not be to other people, and that's fine. To each her own.
VEGETARIANS RULE!! lololol :)

I can't pretend

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 20:52:41 GMT

I feel so. . .empty. Deadened. Weakened.My thoughts keep straying to "Why bother?" I feel flat. I asked for the truth and it came out, but now I'm left with shadows and unanswered questions. All I'm left with now is "What now?"
So what do I do? I can't go back. I can't pretend. The truth is the truth and I will never say anything else. But how can I go on in a gray, hollow world? I need relief. Any kind of relief. I search around and don't find any, no matter where I go. Still, I can't pretend.
I feel so. . .betrayed. All that was is lost. The only thing I had left in the world was ripped out, leaving nothing but a bloody wound. It's like someone tore my heart out while I was still awake.
Now what? I'm not sad. That's not my feeling. Just. . .empty. Unexcited. I can't leave my thoughts and opinions out of the situation, I'll lose myself if I do and I vowed never to let that happen. I need to know my own head.

JK Rowling talks about dementors in her Harry Potter books. Hollow, horrible hooded creatures that lurk in the darkest and foulest of places, feeding off the good of human emotion. Leaving the person feeling dead, expressionless, in a deep depression. Like they'll never be cheerful again. Little did she know that dementors actually exist.
They're not just make believe. They're just called by different names here in the real world. They're called loved ones.

That's all I have to say for now.

Happy Lammas!!!

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 19:26:00 GMT

I just wanted to post a quick entry in my journal and say that as of right now, I'm feeling very blessed. Happy Lammas to all, all of my precious friends (online and otherwise), and although my family isn't wiccan, I extend my joy to them, as well.
Wicca has brought nothing but love to my life, I'm so grateful that both the Goddess and God are watching after my life and welcoming me with open arms to this religion. Nothing else suits me better.
I'm planning to pray tonight and give my love and gratitude to The Goddess and God. I also plan to thank them for giving me such wonderful friends and opportunities.
:)
Blessed Be, everyone. I love all the friends, my Sisters as Dream A New Dream Coven and my family so much.

Life is hectic lol

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 15:07:52 GMT

A lot has been going on lately, part of it good and a part of it bad.
I joined the website sparkpeople to try to live a healthy lifestyle. I'm sick of this worrying/obsessing over weight. I just want to live normally. The things that use to terrify me when I was younger just bore me now. So what if I think I'm fat. Who really cares? My family tells me I'm not and although I can see a lot of fat when I look in the mirror, I'm tired of the same old mind-eye tricks. What am I really seeing? What do I really look like? It just takes too much energy and I have way too much going on in my life to really give it any time. While I'm a little freaked, the majority of me just waves it away and concentrates on something else. I'm sick of this. It has to stop somewhere, and I'm the only one who can make it go away.
I'm running 2-3 times a week now, a little less than I should, and although I feel kind of bad about it, I think I should learn to rest my knee so it doesn't start acting up again. I do NOT want to have to stop running for a year or so. It hurt yesterday after a partiularly hard run, so today I'm resting it. Tomorrow and the next day will be running days. I'm having a lot of fun jogging around the whole neighborhood.
Yesterday I went back to the old neighborhood and saw our old house, the one we had on Westend. It was sad.
So now that I'm feeling this way, who catches the weight-paranoia bug? My sister Angela. She thinks she's fat because she can't fit into some particular shirts. I feel bad for her up to a point, but when she starts throwing hissy fits and taking it out on other people, that's where I draw the line. She was really rude to me all day. It's getting to the point where I just find excuses to leave the house so I don't have to put up with her. Also, she's trying to cut her calories way down. I guess she's getting like 500-800 a day. I know that's bad, but talking to her doesn't help. If I talk to her or give it any attention at all, it'll just get worse because she's getting what she wants: sympathy and attention. I know I sound mean, but you'd have to know her to understand. She's kind of a wannarexic at times. :( Eventually, she'll have to eat again. Believe me, she'll eat. When she does, all this weight will come FLYNG back, and then more. You can't starve or drastically cut calories, it just doesn't work. It makes you fat.

Anyways, that little rant is over. Now onto the next thing: I've decided to become a vegetarian. I'm really happy about my decision. I've just been having these thoughts that eating meat (or fish, and eggs) is wrong. They've been creeping up on me for a few months and I've decided to just give it all up and start a new, healthy lifestyle, one that I find morally and healthy-wise fulfilling. I'm actually kind of proud of myself. My family doesn't understand, they treat me kind of weird, but I don't care. See, I don't think killing and eating animals is wrong. That's only natural, other animals do it, our ancestors did it. That's the way of life. It's when mankind takes the animals and creates horrific places like slaughter houses, or when they cage the animals and inject them with chemicals and sell them as a worthless product with no regard to their life, that really outrages me. That's soulless. Disgusting. Terrible, cruel. I'm running out of appropriate adjectives. I feel the same way toward poaching. I dont believe in animal fur. People kill off tens of thousands of animals for their furs, horns,etc., just to make a little money. It was different back when our ancestors did it, they skinned animals for shelter against the cold. Horrifically killing animals just to skin them and make a few bucks is outrageous. I canNOT STAND animal fur. I can't even stand fake animal fur because it looks so much like to real thing, it's like a mockery of what people do to animals.
So that's why I decided to stop eating meat (of any kind) eggs, and fish. I'm not sure if I shold cut out dairy or not, but I am definetely working on it. I'm proud of my new principles. They mean a lot to me, and I'm sticking with them. I don't care if Mom likes it or not. She's not exactly supportive when it comes to vegetarianism, but oh well. I don't need her support.

Soooo, that's what's been going on. (That and a few other things.)
I know my post was a little long, but that's okay. :) I'm glad I finally got some extra time to write in my journal!!! Phew! lol

Joey

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 15:30:32 GMT

I feel so awful.

Yesterday I had to give away my cat Joey to the humane society. I did it for a lot of reasons (at least that's what I kept telling myself) but now I just feel empty. I've had him for seven years, I helped nurse him to health when he was a baby. He thought of me as a mother.
Now he's gone, I'll never get to see him again. The only way to get him back is to spend $70 for his adoption out, and I don't have the money.
*sob* I am such a heartless, cold bitch.
I never knew how much I thought of him as a little son until now. I want him back here. I don't want to give him away, I wish I had never done this. I am an awful person.
I gave him away because I thought it would be better for him, I was fed up with him, always mad at him, ignoring him. He was getting on my nerves. Now I'm over that and I just want him back. This wasn't the right decision at all, I'm TERRIBLE. I deserve to hurt.
Why did I do this? I bet Joey's alone and afraid. I can only hope beyond life that he can be adopted, into a LOVING family that will pay attention to him. Please, please don't let him get into an abusive household!!!!!

The only shred of hope I have is that Mom said the guy told her that he has a good chance of adoption because he's so friendly.

I miss Joey so bad.

Just my feelings

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 21:37:19 GMT

I want to start trying pilates, but my laziness is taking over. Despite the pain in my feet, I've really enjoyed just kicking back and relaxing, like everyone else does. The one good thing about hurting myself is that now I have time to spend my summer the way a 'normal' teenager does, just doing things I love. Now I can sleep in worry free! lol I love to workout, but I use to feel trapped by it, like I was forced to exercise or I'd get fat. :( That was hard. This time around I want things to be different. When I get to run again, I want to do it ONLY for fun. Nothing else. If I want to stop, then I'll stop.
I have such an addictive personality (it runs in the family) that I think I let things overtake me too easily. It's that way with everything. Food, caffeine, thought processes, exercise, diets. I need to work on that. It'll be okay, though. Everyone has things to work on.

Now if I can just get rid of this fear that over the summer I'll gain a whole bunch of weight. . .lol. If I'm careful I won't.

I'm hurt

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 15:07:09 GMT

I tried to run but I ended up handicapping myself. My ankles got hurt real bad, I can barely walk. I think I cracked a small bone or something, it HURTS and I can't move it very well. This is frustrating for me because I LOOOOOOOOVE to workout, but now that I got hurt there's no way I can. What am I going to do? How come every time I try to tun something bad happens?

I got to run!!!

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 19:21:43 GMT

I'm feeling so much better today, I went for my first run since last August!! My knee hurts only a little, and that's because I strained it going uphill so much. From now on I'll power walk up hills and then break into a run once I reach flat ground. It kind of sucks because Mom made me stop after only 40 minutes (it was so hot I was getting cold lol) but oh well. At least I got to do anything! I'm so grateful. I feel a lot better knowing I had the guts to get out there and just DO IT. (I'm SUCH a procrastinator.) I'm so self conscious it was hard for me at first but my running cravings got the best of me and I didn't care what anyone thought. I just HAD to run. :) It went fabulous.

Turning 20

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 23:28:51 GMT

It's been awhile since I actually felt like posting anything on here at all. I've been kind of down lately, I feel depressed and sad. Luckily, I seem to be getting over it (somewhat.) My mom lost her job, so we're living REALLY tightly. My thoughts are getting darker. My birthday's in September but I'm dreading it with all my heart. I don't want to turn 20. I hate myself for getting this old. :( I wish I could turn back time. I'm scared. I also realized that I will never again be a teenager.
My life seems to be shrinking. I miss being 17-19, those were really the best times of my whole life. I know it's awhile away, but the tension and stress is growing on me. The year after this one I'll be 21, I don't know if I'm ready for it. I feel sick. I wish I could talk to Mom about this but she just doesn't understand. This is fear, plain and simple. I wish I had a better life so I could actually look forward to merging into my 20s and know I have loved ones behind me. Urgh. . .it sounds so shallow. I sound like one of those self pitying people. Sorry about that. I'm just having a tough time anymore and I'm not sure where all this is coming from. I want to hide. Why does the world expect so much out of me? It's not fair, I'm not ready for it. I feel like crying right now.
I remember feeling this way when I was 17 going on 18, I wasn't sure how to act or what to do. Technically I was an adult but I didn't have an adult's life. Now it's the same thing. I'm getting closer and I feel like shriveling. *sniff* I'm such a terrible loser.
Forgive my self centered rants.

Good bye Ronnie

Sat, 21 Jun 2008 19:26:17 GMT

Too late, Too gone
Ronnie's in prison
My stomach is aching
I already miss him.
Too late, Too gone
You'll never come back
There's the truth
Of a life on crack.
Our pain was your drugs
You used to get high
This poem is my heart
I'm saying good bye.
How can we forgive
How can we believe
Your words were all lies
You used to deceive.

Good bye Ronnie, I hope you get well soon. I miss you.

Goddess prayer

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 00:51:37 GMT

Goddess,
Maiden, Mother and Crone, in all Her beautiful aspects, My Sister and My Guide, Protectress of All Wombyn, I come to you today and honor you in prayer. Thank you for being in my life. Thank you for opening yourself to me and letting me see wisdom in its full extent, even though I have many other roads to travel.
I love you, you are my heart.
Maiden, Mother, Queen, Crone and Hag, Please feel my love for this evening and know I hold you always in highest respect. Please continue to guide me through all walks in life, please let me see through your gracious wisdom.
With harm to none, let this love be so. Water, earth, air and fire, You are my spirit.

Bedbugs

Thu, 29 May 2008 18:33:26 GMT

We've spent the entire week cleaning out our house for bedbugs. This is disgusting. We've had to throw away our sofa, our beds, some of our clothes. Everything we own had to be washed TWICE and stuffed into big dark bags and stowed in the living room until the exterminator came to poison the insects. DISGUSTING. We've never had an infestation of anything before, and I'm glad this is over. This week has been pure hell. I'm TIRED, HUNGRY, GRUMPY. My sister and I had to camp on the living room floor for six days, just to make sure we wouldn't get anymore bites. The bugs make it a lifestyle to feed off of humans. GROSS. Needless to say I'm not in a very good mood. I just want our house back to normal. From now on I'm going to clean every little corner of our house, and spray with chemicals every three weeks, just to make sure.
Stupid insects.

Prayer to Water

Tue, 20 May 2008 23:17:29 GMT

Earth, strong Mother and security,
Air, Life in which we breathe,
Fire, Light in which our spirits crave,

Sacred element of Water, spirits of mermaids and dolphins, Foam of which Aphrodite was born, I pray to you today in honor of the rainfall we are receiving. My sweet Sister, She who cleanses sorrow, She who renews, I visualize a candle in my heart, giving light to you.
I thank you for being with me last night in our ritual, I thank you for gracing my heart with the beat of your own. I feel whole once you are here. I love you, dearest Water. I pray to you now. Thank you for listening. With harm to none, Blessed Be!
Blessed Be, Sacred Earth, Sacred Air, Sacred Fire!

Sweet Sisterhood

Tue, 20 May 2008 16:02:29 GMT

I always feel renewed after attending an online ritual with my fellow Sisters. I feel like all my sorrows and anger are just wiped away by the power of The Goddess. Spending time bathing in the cleansing waters of Pure, Sweet Sisterhood is just the thing my spirit needs when I'm tired and beaten. I had never felt more close to those Wombyn than that night. :) I swear, more amazing feelings have been gifted to me since announcing my faith as a Dianic Wiccan than ever before in my life. I was never truly a religous person, but I'm so honored Goddess called to me. Where would I be if She hadn't? I can't believe how Graced my life is. All I want to do is show my love for Her in the best way.

The Goddess has blessed my life in so many ways. She pulled me from a dark place and gave me hope. She gave me love, wonderful friends, understanding, strength. I give Her my heart. I'll always be a Dianic because I know Her love is true.

Prayer of Gratitude

Fri, 16 May 2008 16:12:48 GMT

To my beloved matron Goddess Aphrodite. . .
With the feel of love and gratitude in my heart. . .

Thank you for giving me the depth to open my eyes, my heart and my mind. Thank you for blessing my life with fertility, passion and grace. Thank you for cleansing my spirit with you life giving waters, purifying me again and making me whole. Thank you for teaching me new lessons everyday, even though those lessons might be hard or painful. I know that parts of me are changing everyday for the better, and I put my faith in your Gracious Light to lead me down the Path of Wisdom. You are the Great Goddess, your powers are natural and beautiful. You give to me a part that no one else can. I never knew how fulfilling you could be. Thank you for being patient with me while I work out my pettiness. Thank you for giving me your hand and pulling me through darkness, thank you for answering my questions and giving me signs of faith. Thank you giving me strength and hope when I thought all else was lost. Thank you for your wonderful gifts, the ones you share with Earth and Her people everyday. Thank you for love, sex and fertility, without any of these our light would fade. Thank you for depth and creativity, without these our souls would fade. Thank you for hidden little gifts, thank you for your sacred Gift of Playful Love.
Thank you for visiting me and blessing my life with your fruitful passions, in whichever form they choose to take. Thank you for allowing me the wisdom to see I must accept the good with the bad. Thank you for the ability to adapt to change, thank you for comforting me while I cried, thank you for protecting me when I hurt, and for the wisdom to know I have the power to pull my own self up when I think all else is lost.

My Gracious Matron Goddess, Aphrodite as Fruit of Earth, Great Mother Goddess and Queen of Love, I give my heart to you this morning as you decide to visit us in your cleansing rains. I feel your presence, I feel your Grace. I accept the knowledge you have given to me and know there is more to come, for none of us ever stop learning. For this day, for this moment, I feel your vivacious blessing and soak in the warm glow you give. I love you, sweet Aphrodite. Maiden and mother with wisdom of crone, thank you for listening, I feel you in my heart.
With harm to none, Blessed Be.

April

Writer's Block: The sound of inspiration

Fri, 16 May 2008 15:51:27 GMT

What type of music inspired me?

ROCK! Rock, rock, rock!!!!!!! I love hard rock, or 'hardcore' music. Escape The Fate, My Chemical Romance, Evanescence, The Used, etc. They really inspire me to be creative, they make me feel 'dark', in a way. Whenever I hear a song like one of those I just want to go write something exactly like that, it takes me back, it takes me deeper. :) I hear it when I'm sleeping, or when I'm sad. Had rocks equals LOVE.